I’m all for cuddly toys. I’m not going to lie; Fraser, a slightly off-brown rabbit which my mum got free with a purchase of Estee Lauder when I was 6, remains at my bedside to this day. Even at the age of 27, his presence invites normality. He’s always there, just hanging out. The fact that global brands are now taking advantage of the child inside and associating powerful FMCG brands and financial services with these soft and cuddly statues of childhood is brand association at its lowest.

Aleksandr Orlov has a lot to answer for. A Russian meerkat from Meerkovo is pimping himself and his friends out to grown adults looking to buy car, van, home and pet insurance. And the Great British public is LAPPING IT UP. Simples.

The renowned scientist and founder of the modern method of freezing food has been immortalised by frozen food company Birdseye as a stuffed polar bear, voiced by experimental thespian Willem Dafoe. Come on. Am I the only one who feels a little bit taken advantage off?

Brands are using increasingly personal methods to highjack our purchasing power. Ellie Goulding singing Your Song at Christmas tugged on every heartstring in the nation. Don’t get me started on the dog in the snow! And now these cuddly toys are encouraging us to buy fish fingers and contents insurance.

I feel violated.

Only need 4 more tokens for my Clarence though. And then the Smeg will be mine. Oh yes… It will be mine…